3 Mistakes that are Preventing You from Improving Your Self-Discipline

Over the last several years of being in the online industry, I have seen so much fluff & BS around self-discipline. 

I've spent the last 10-plus years healing. (I've lost count, TBH.) Within those 10 years, I developed the self-discipline most women dream of. 

I wake up without an alarm. 

I train for half marathons. 

I show up regardless of how I feel. 

I do ALL the income-generating activities. 

My turnaround time is impeccable. This is something that my business coach kept telling me how impressed she was by my work. 

Over time, I've wanted to share about self-discipline. But I didn't realize until the last few years that your healing has EVERYTHING to do with your self-discipline. 

The reason why you're not disciplined has to do with your trauma, not cuz you're in your own way!

It has nothing to do with your willpower or being lazy! In fact, if you've read Atomic Habits by James Clear. You already know this. 

The less you use your willpower, the better off you are. 

The reality is the reason why self-discipline is so damn hard has to do with a nervous system that is unregulated and constantly in a stress response. Check out this guided meditation if you're ready to ease your nervous system. 

So, if you're someone who is constantly struggling to wake up earlier, get to the gym first thing in the morning; no matter what you do or how hard you try, this is for you!

Remember, your trauma is the reason why you're so resistant & have certain beliefs about discipline. 

Here are 3 mistakes you're making that make self-discipline so much harder than it has to be. 

1. You see self-discipline as a form of punishment. Let's face it: most of us were disciplined growing up. Sometimes, that discipline was borderline abusive or blatantly abusive. Naturally, you don't want to be disciplined cuz you don't want to punish yourself. I see you! Here's the thing, self-discipline is fucking freedom. It seems restrictive. It seems like punishment, but it's that way cuz you've been conditioned to see it as restrive & punishing. It's the complete opposite. (PS- for my people pleasears that are afraid to say no. There's no better excuse to say no than to show up for yourself the next day! Just saying.)

2. You're a go BIG or go HOME kinda gal. Let me tell you, I am the same way, especially in my party days. Once I started, it was over for me. The thing is, the go big or go home mentality is actually a trauma response. Not only is it a trauma response, but it's also a self-fulling prophecy to prove to yourself that you don't have what it takes cuz you tried to do it all at once rather than taking steps that compound over time.  The smaller the bite, the easier it is for you to implement and stick to. 

3. You have unrealistic expectations of what self-discipline is. Self-discipline does NOT equal you'll never fail or mess up. Or you'll always eat healthy. Or you'll exercise every single day.  Even on the days you feel like death. NOPE. It's not like that at all, actually. Self-discipline is a practice just like everything else. With that practice, especially when you first do this, you're gonna suck at it! Some days, you're gonna be really good at it. That's okay. The idea of being perfect always prevents you from being disciplined the way you desire. There are always going to be areas of your life that need improvement. That's okay. That's what all of this is about: a journey. Not a destination. 

Are you making these mistakes? 

Do you see self-discipline as punishment? 

Do you go big or nothing at all? 

Do you have unrealistic expectations of yourself? 

Do you want to develop a self-discipline that's easy and aligned for you? This free masterclass to be Unstoppable and self-disciplined is for you! Check it out here. (There's no email required. It's a 60-minute training that dives deep into self-discipline.)